Sunday, 20 June 2010
CHILDREN NEED A CLEAN OASIS IN WHICH TO GROW UP
With the best will in the world it is hard not to regurgitate old stories with ex's. You want to get on, you don't want the children to be used as pawns, and you want life to have some family feeling to it. It is virtually impossible to be not reminded all the time of your failings. If only we were given lessons on how to be a good parent or given exams on whether we were suitable or not, but we are not. The truth is that children end up living in situations that they themselves can't deal with, and feel they have to take sides. This is terrible. When a new woman comes into the situation we are meant to treat them with huge respect, give them everything without so much as a hint that we are fed up.. Second and third wives are given importance that they have sometimes not yet earned and may not deserve. Often when the man has made considerable amount of money the women they attract are avaricious, hard and calculating whilst the ex-wife is made to feel mad and crazy as her children get torn between pillar and post. It is awful to see and tricky to stop. It would be great if everyone got on. However in this world of quickly-used throwaway, no husband will have sensible foresight to keep the peace. We live in terrible times, divorce is rife, in rich and poor alike, families are split, beautiful souls broken. No matter how pious people are in your stories, we are all to blame, we all do it, and it should stop. Families are little businesses actually - not very romantic - but there should be a beautiful clean oasis in which children be allowed to mature and learn new things. It's a sad fact that mothers and fathers have to bang on a front doors until they open in order to see a child that they love and adore probably more than any other person in the world. This happens all the time, just look around and listen. I only met my father at 22 and it has worried me everyday. It caused huge problems in my family and I like many other children never walked down the street holding his hand. He was banned. So next time you hear couples arguing, with mothers saying they don't want the children to see their fathers - or vice versa - remember to argue for the child. Please remember.