Saturday, 1 May 2010
“Integrity is telling myself the truth. And honesty is telling the truth to other people.” Spencer Johnson
People talk a lot about HONESTY these days, in a dull sincere voice that has echoes being in Church on a Sunday or listening to the Leader of the Opposition. They bring up the conversation with no humour and that look that immediately makes me suspicious and want to be dishonest just for the hell of it.
I like everyone else hate being lied to and hate lying unless it's a magnificent lie, the sort, just to see if people believe it, e.g making up a long history about yourself that couldn't possibly be true... Facts are facts we lie all the time, we say we like books, films, food all the time which we hate. In this case I prefer people lying, we simply would find the truth too upsetting and sometimes it is.
I hardly ever believe anyone, I used to, but now I don't. That I think is quite sad as I want to believe everybody. Have you noticed that white lies are everywhere". If a man tells me they love me I immediately think they are up to no good.
Somebody is wearing a revolting piece of clothing and everybody says how good they look? Well I suppose that is kindness, but why say anything?, or at least say something truthful like "I love your front garden or your cat" The truth would hurt.
Honesty, honestly honestly...? Honesty is something I both love and hate, it is something that you want to peak at round the corner, and then are shocked at when you know the answer. I really do not need to know whether a boyfriend is up to no good, but of course I like to check, just to see, I am totally curious, and notice everything. Red flags go up the whole time. Sometimes men could lie a little more. I went into one boy friends bedroom where the photograph of his supposed ex girlfriend used to go up and down as I entered the room. It would have been tactful to put it away altogether. I hate promiscuity, at least give me a chance to say I don't like the situation.
I would much rather a girlfriend say to me Amanda that dress looks horrible and do something positive like choose one that looked better for me. Of course their honesty in this case is a matter of opinion, and they could be lying out of jealousy.
There is something about lying that can be utterly appealing and the media has made honesty into an unrealistic target.
When I am dying I don't expect the Doctor will be honest, but in this case it would be helpful, I need to make a will.