Saturday, 2 January 2016


It is the new year with all good thoughts and intentions. I wanted to spend it in an unusual way. I spent it in my house cooking for my sons and for new years eve I had the good fortune to stay at the celebrity favourite, The Chiltern firehouse. I understood why, it was a wonderful night and day having lunch and dinner there. The snug in the restaurant proved intimate and discreet. Perfect for a love affair. The food unusual.  The donuts with crab are totally delicious.  The staff helpful, I organised a table for eight people at the last minute and the cheerful receptionist immediately sorted out the back dining room to entertain in private.
The room was well thought out and so charming with attention to detail. I have been dealing with life and death situations this year and the loss of close family members. Of course it is painful but normal.
I realise posterity, is a big whore, as big a whore as anything else, ah but we all believe and hope we shall be remembered. Unfortunately 15 minutes after 'we kick the bucket' we are forgotten, unless you believe you can leave something of substance to another generation.  This new years eve I had fun dreaming.
If you wish to get anywhere, the worst thing you can do is believe that somebody can help you, you must help yourself. Who cares what people think or say, just do. People will always talk, so give them lots to talk about. I believe in bravery. I believe in laughter. I believe in doing.
I am thinking what I should achieve and change this year. I am ambitious, in my brain I think I can do everything. I like that. I am a director, a dancer, a composer, a model aged 55, a fitness fanatic and so on, I feel that I too can do anything. I could make anybody green with envy with my brain. I love it because that is my reality. Occasionally some spiteful person will remind me that all is not possible or remind me that I am running out of time. I am not and anything with concentration and energy can be

I am determined not to feel guilty, that is a wasted emotion.
I would like to be useful in life to do things bigger than myself.
This morning I was so lucky having my breakfast brought to me, eggs and bacon, beautifully cooked by my lovely son Charles. I used to dream of this and now in front of me they were beautifully presented eggs. I know he can be a star. I used to say all the time I would love to be in his brain, but I am in mine and perhaps it is as good too.
I found myself saying to him "Don't jump down peoples throat and always listen to the end of the sentence"
This year I shall finish my passionate love story between the artist Schiele and his muse Wally. One way or another I shall make it. I believe in it.
That is one of my projects.
Say anything with passion and people listen.
Other ideas...
I could be an agent too.
For now I am in love with new opera singers, last year it was composers, next year perhaps dancers.? I would love to be an agent.
My favourite new Opera singers.
1. Sofia Dimtrova from Bulgaria
2. Clare Ghig from Malta
3. Corinn Springer from USA
4. Jose Daniel Mojica from Puerto Rico

Here I go and so far so good..

1 comment:

Pete Cater said...

I think you would make an excellent agent/manager. When can you start?