Thursday 20 August 2009

CROSS FIRE AND FUNNY GAMES



What a week its been between wanting to sling out guests who stub ciggies in my shrubs to hanging out with some of Hollywoods extra characers. Along with finding out about Womans Extenze, on television, that gives women that extra edge of sexual energy. Well I won't be needing that. I have too much.
I love this city, and tonight was without exception. I went for a little sushi with my good friend Michel Comte, Mr super photographer and his wife Ayako. He brought with him Nikki Haskell, a woman who certainly won't be needing Womans Extenze, judging by her comments at dinner. Her appartment overlooking Sunset Boulevard, is the home of many a star, from Joan Collins to Elton John. How fabulous would it be first thing in the morning, in the lift, meeting all of them barefaced, I would run for a burkha. Anyway Nikki can do everything from painting to sculpting, once a top television hostess. Her apartment was suitably kitch with pale pink, green and grey chintz, and silk flowers alongside Warhol's portraits of her. I left armed with her beauty regimes one of them called Star Cruncher, guarantees abs and a figure like Joanie, and anything Miss Collins puts her name to I am following. Then Nikki told me she had made some slimming pills, STARCAPS, I looked on the bottle and they were made from Guave and Garlic. Now I definitely wanted those. So I begged. I shall again be skinny. That reminds me the Brazilians are coming back. Ypee starvation is coming soon.
Having taken them this morning I have been on the loo ever since. They must be working. I am going to nag her for some more. I have lost 2pounds since the morning. Now the STAR CRUNCH guarantees a six pack, the exercise machine that you wear like a belt. It has pullys from the waist. I am in the middle of cross fire whether it will work or not. The pills do. When Nikki put the belt on last night, I thought she was going to bunjy like buzz from the 28th Floor of her building.

Two nights ago I had dinner with Freddy Demann and his wife, who has created so much talent in this town, from Madonna to Stevie Wonder. The SLS has a Tapas restaurant with wierd recipes, from spun sugar over foie gras. Love the look of it, Stark created a sensation.

My house is now being taken over by celebrities and run efficiently by P.R Miss Tess Finkle. A fun blonde with the best spirit, she guarantees that she will always pull through. I can see it won't be the typical LA bullshit. She does it with a smile. But lets not forget my fav public relation girlies Lara Shriftman and Eileen Koch, but there is room for everybody. Both incidently blonde too now I am off to meet some of the youth..

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